Forbidden Boys

When I first entered college , I was too shy !

Or as a matter of fact , I thought boys are dangerous thing , so they isolate us from them for about 10 years , hoping that when we and them get into college , each of us are adults enough  by then !

I supposed  this , any way!

During  high school , and when I go to market or something , and it happens if I see a boy , I get so confused and my face blushes , and this continued for about 1 month of the college !

And then I was introduced to persons that break my shyness down , I always say if I'm a shy I wouldn't change !

Okay , all right !

They use to say to me I'm a leader personality !  but i always need a push , but I don't agree with them

I always adore peace and calmness and hates people gossip and chet chat !

At the same time I have the ability to listen and to be a friend to the most difficult personality in the world , it won't be more complicated than me any way … at least as I think !

okay , let's return to what I was saying..

I got involved in many activities in college , and I got over my shyness problem , but I faced another problem as a result !

The 10 years of isolation between boys and girls , as much as it's useful and wise as much as it is unfair !

How can a boy doesn't speak to a girl for 10 years , gets used to the presence of her might sit next to him at the chair in a lecture ! he is human being at the end!

All right , my personality is always encouraging …

I encourage every person that I think he/ she has talent in any thing !!

But this is not normal thing for a girl , here !

There is a rule … you encourage >>>> you care !

How stupid that rule is ?!!?

Me, myself love writing so much, in Arabic or in English , and I wrote for the first time at the first year of college !

And for this I considered not a normal , girl !

If you are beautiful , clever , has other interests other than medicine , you are not normal !

So be ready to have harasses , get envied and hear gossips for things deserve and other and are the most NOT!!

I won't tell what those people said about me , they are all ignorant and don't deserve my attention , at least this is what I try to persuade myself in !

Now

-I don't dare to ask a male-colleague how is he … this  will  be understood BY ANOTHER WAY!

-I don't dare to write publicly , this  will  be understood BY ANOTHER WAY!

-I don't dare to have public discussion , this  will  be understood BY ANOTHER WAY!

When I still had a face book account which I hate the most , there was a male- friend , whom I respect very much , he is open minded and older  than me , I didn't dare to congratulate him for his birthday_ in spite knowing when is it by my events in that damned face book_by sending something on his wall , coz this will be explained by another way  by my friends or by his ! and I didn’t dare to congratulate him by a private message coz I fear the word private by itself and till know I blame myself for not wishing him a happy birthday !

For a reason of my raising up environment and my family's way in education , I wasn't shocked by dealing with boys , at the contrast, I feel so happy when I discuss worthy things with boys more than girls , and i don't know the reason behind that !...  and by a reason of having an angelic brother , I thought all the boys are angels like him!this fact is not true , with sorrow

I talk too much now a days , don’t get used to it , I'm so moody as you know , but this may be continued !

And before i forget , special thanks to all my readers form Istanbul , and of course all around the world .